Monday, January 28, 2013

It's Been a Sh*tty Day!

So after getting back home and with everyone sick, I took the girls to the doctor this morning. I think I got off the phone at 8:05 am scheduling an appointment at 9 am. THAT SAME MORNING!

I raced around the house, honking at the girls to hurry up with their coats and shoes. I threw snacks and waters into a bag and we ran out to the car. By 8:20 we were pulling out the driveway. The doctor's office is over an hour away and I had 40 minutes to get there. So you do the math to determine how fast I was driving. Let's just say it was less than 85 but faster than 75...most of the time!

In fact, I was so nervous about how fast I was driving, I quickly slowed down and lept into the right lane when I saw a fast approaching Jeep in my rear view mirror. Something about his speed startled me and I thought the only reason someone could be going THAT fast is 1) they are undercover police officers, 2) they are just plain stupid or 3) they legitimately have to be somewhere! Whatever the reason, I figured it was better that they lead the way and smoke out any cops hidden along the way. As the Jeep passed, I looked in to see if there were any radios or guns. There were neither. Just two average looking men. So I chalked up their speed to stupidity and merged back to the left lane and kept on my merry little way.

The Jeep, traveling much faster than me for the record, took off. A few miles down the road, I caught up to him because some joker was, get this, going 70 mph in a 70 mph zone! The nerve! The Jeep sat on the slow poke for what seemed like eternity before slow poke finally got over. Again, the Jeep took off and we were on our way once more.

These little slow ups happened about two more times. On the second one, the slowpoke decided he was going to show the Jeep and NOT get over. The next thing I knew, the Jeep flipped on police lights...but police lights like I'd never seen. They just flashed down along the rear bumper and they didn't make any noise. I just about died because here I had been speeding along right behind a cop! The guy in front of the Jeep, probably did the same because he pulled the car off to the side of the highway before I could say "Oh sh*t!" To my surprise, the Jeep just kept going but this time took off at a clip well over 100 mph. He was gone in a flash with his police lights off! It was the strangest thing! Anyone else seen a police car like that? They clearly aren't going after traffic violations!

Anyway, I barely made it to the doctor's office. I come tumbling in, both kids in my arms because they won't move fast enough, and check in for my 9 am appointment. They can't find me anywhere in the system and I am about to lose it when they announce that my appointment is at 9:15 - not 9 am! They told me 9 so they could pad their schedule. Are you kidding me?! I drove how fast? Risked a ticket? An accident? So they could have 15 minutes of flex time?!?!

At 9:30 we are FINALLY taken back to the exam room. (I don't think I'll ever be on time for a doctor's appointment again!). During our wait, Grace and Charlotte decide that being quiet is for the birds. They decide to jump off the side of the exam table which is raised pretty high off the ground, over and over again. I am sure the nurses thought I was nuts because there was no way these two girls could be sick if they were THIS active and making THIS much noise. Well, the jumping off the table on your own volition got boring. So Charlotte decdided to take it up a notch by pushing Grace off the table. See where this is going??

In a nutshell, it got ugly fast. Crying. Arguing. Cursing. Sweating.


Finally, the doctor conducted the exam and sent us on our way. As all they'd wanted to do since we got there was go home, you'd think at least this part would have gone well.


Charlotte kicked and cried all the way to the parking lot. She kicked my coat pocket that held my phone and then this happened...

It's only Monday and by noon I'd already had two sick kid confirmations, a trip to Best Buy and spent an obscene amount of money replacing my broken phone. 

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