Apple Harvest

We had some Seattle friends in town so we decided to take them to Bill's Berry Farm where apple and pumpkin harvest was in full swing.

Getting kids to pose is nearly impossible.

Here are my attempts. 

They just want to look anywhere BUT the camera.

After a pose at the entrance, we grabbed some grub and hit the swings.

Does anyone else find this terrifying?

Then it was onto the petting zoo, pony rides and the train. 

The weather was crappy that day so we didn't get to hit the pumpkin patch OR the corn maze! Guess we'll just have to go back!

We did manage to sneak in some apple picking while our friends were in town.

Charlotte couldn't wait to bite into a juicy apple. 

A lovely (almost) fall weekend.

Charlotte's First Haircut

It was long overdue for the baby mullet to go so off we went to Monkey Dooz.

Somehow in the mix of scooping up two children, loading them in the car, paying and taking these pictures I lost the little locket of hair the hairdresser gave me to commemorate Charlotte's first hair cut. I was bummed. I retraced my steps like a crazy person but no hair. I am hoping that it is hiding between the seats in my car - even though I've looked there twice.

 Luckily, I was the only crazy one running around. Charlotte was unfazed.  

Let's Talk About Snow White

Every time Grace asks to talk about Snow White it's all I can do to NOT bust out in song to the tune of Salt N Peppa...but I don't.  I refrain.

But I do have to jot this before-bed ritual down because it's one I don't want to forget when I'm old and gray.

Here is how bedtime goes in our house.
Dinner.
Baths. Clarification. Grace takes a shower. Charlotte takes a bath.
Jammies. Brushing of the hair and teeth.
Charlotte gets a bottle a few stories and she is out. It takes her 15 minutes - tops! - to put herself to sleep.

Grace on the other hand is a different story. She requires her favorite blankie, a fistful of binkys (still!) and  at least three stories. The first story is ALWAYS her "Sleeping Beauty Book" and the other two change from day to day. For a long time it was Ferdinand. Anyway, after the books are read and the lights are turned out it is time to sit and talk.

"What do you want to talk about tonight?" I ask, even though the answer is always the same.

"Snow White! Snow White makes pizza with green and blue and black (M&Ms) on top!" she replies.

"Oh yeah?" I always answer in surprise. "Is it yummy? Do the Seven Dwarfs like pizza with candy on top?"

"Yes."

Then I ask a series of questions. They are always the same questions and in the same order.
Does Snow White like to fly in airplanes? Does Snow White like to drive a car like Mommy? Does Snow White like to swim in the ocean like a dolphin?

She shakes her head no.

Then it is on to the story. Again, same questions. Same order. Every night.
Does Snow White like to sing? Does she like to eat apples? Does she eat an apple? Is it a poisonous apple?

She answers yes to all the above.

"Who gives her the apple?"I ask.
"The witch." she says.
"And does Snow fall asleep?"
"Yes."
"Who comes to wake her up?"
"The Prince."
"And how does the Prince wake her up?"
"With a kiiiiiiissssss."

Then the fun part begins.

"What color horse does the Prince ride?" I ask knowing she is going to smirk and say, "The Prince rides a tree." Then she dies laughing - every night - because she knows 1) the prince rides a white horse and 2) who rides a tree?

So I say - mind you this is every night for months now - a tree?!?!? You silly goose. The prince doesn't ride a tree. But she insists that he does.

To move on, I ask her what color horse she likes to ride. Her answer - a black baby horse.
What color horse does Daddy ride? A white horse.
And Mommy? A purple horse.
And Charlotte? An orange baby horse.
And Grandma? A red horse.
And Grandpa? A BIG horse.
And Aunt Molly? A green baby horse.
And Uncle John Andrew? A yellow horse.
And Uncle Tygh? A gray horse.
And Aunt Sarah? A pink horse.
And Baby June? A brown baby horses.

"They are all horses!" she says.

At this point, I can usually convince her that Charlotte "needs" my help and that after I help Charlotte, I'm going to brush my hair and teeth and put on my jammies. Once that is all done, I will come back and continue talking to you. What would you like to talk about when I come back?

She usually says Daddy, Grandma or Grandpa.

And usually, she is asleep before she remembers that I am supposed to come back and finish our talk! On the off nights, we are summoned several times to read another story, to get her a glass of water, to find the binky that is lost in the covers...you get the idea. She is already a master at stall tactics...but most of the time, our talk about Snow White does the trick.

There you have it. Our bedtime routine. Not swift. Not efficient. But definitely unique!

School Part II

Grace had her first "real" day of school today...kinda. Yes, today was where the parents were to come in, get their child settled, say good-bye and secretly cross their fingers and pray that their child wasn't The One. And that all happened except for Grace because I never left. Not because I am a stage-mom hovering over her every move. The school is a co-op which means that parents work in the classroom about once a month. The first day of school happened to be my day to help.

Again, no sleep the night before Grace's class. I didn't know if it was good or bad to be in the classroom the first day. Would it be harder for her to separate? Would she get upset when I was helping the other children? Would she understand that normally I wouldn't be in the classroom with her?

When all the other parents began saying good-bye, I found Grace playing with some match box cars and explained to her that the mommies and daddies were leaving now, that today was special and I got to stay but that in the future, mommy would leave too. She didn't seem phased. She was really into sending some matchbox cars down a sloped speedway.

In the classroom, just the teacher, students and a couple of moms, the kids started exploring their classroom. There was play dough, an art project, puzzles, toys, dolls - LOTS of fun stuff! I was assigned to the rug - basically playing with the kids on the floor. I figured Grace would be my shadow but she was off doing something on her own. I tried not to interact with her. I really focused on the other kids. Grace seemed ok. She came over and checked-in a couple of times but when she eventually moved on to another activity.

Class was two hours and it felt like an eternity to me. It must have seemed like a lifetime to the kids. About an hour in, you could see them all start to get tired. There were tears from a few and I tried really, really hard to comfort those little ones who wanted their 'mamas' because I know I would want someone to do the same for Grace.

Towards the end of class, I think Grace has a break through moment. A little girl, R, was playing with some blocks and I was playing with her. Grace came over to watch. Little R started saying she was going to make a big mess and then knocked the blocks over. You would have thought Eddie Murphy was live, in-classroom telling jokes the way Grace laughed. She thought R making a mess with the blocks was off the charts funny. When R saw Grace laughing she started laughing and then the two were inseparable for the next 15 minutes making messes with the blocks. While this seems pretty mundane, this was a game-changer for Grace. I think she realized that she could communicate and interact with another child. After playing with the blocks, I saw her and R playing little games near the door, I saw Grace go up to other kids and initiate a "conversation" (aka shrieks of joy that in toddler, I assume mean, hey you seem cool, let's hang out!).

All in all, it was a great day! I liked being in the classroom the first day. It was nice seeing what the students were doing in the classroom so that I could talk about it and get Grace ready for next time. I think  it gave Grace some confidence and an understanding that school wasn't anything scary.

Funny side note. Because it was the first day, we had a teacher's assistant in the classroom. She was there to assist the parents - to show us how to set up, clean-up and prepare the snack. Like I said above, I tried not to interact with Grace and at the very end, the TA came up and asked if Grace was my daughter. When I said yes, the TA responded, "Oh I just put that together. She is very independent!" I laughed and said, "We'll see. We will see."

After class, I asked Grace if she liked school...if she had had fun. She said, "Yes, Grace didn't cry!" She didn't cry...that is right! Now the real test, school next week sans Mom! I'm sure I will be getting a lot of sleep this week!

Ballet

Since Grace's first day of school I haven't slept much. Do you know that feeling you get before a big test or a big presentation or just something BIG that you are nervous or anxious about and before you fall asleep all you can do is mull it over and over in your mind while the pit in your stomach grows bigger and bigger? 

That's the way I've been feeling about Grace and school.

In an effort to help Grace get more comfortable when I am not around I signed her up for a ballet class here in town. It is a half hour once a week and yesterday was the first day. There is only one other little girl in the class but I think that is perfect. Small and simple!

I walked Grace into the studio. Charlotte was in the backpack otherwise I'm sure she would have tried to join right in! I introduced Grace to her instructor and sat down quietly in the corner as the girls started their warm-up.

I could tell Grace was a little unsure but we've been talking and reading a lot of books about ballet.

In fact, she's so excited about ballet - and getting a red tutu - that she has initiated potty training all by herself. (I told her the only way to get a tutu was to do ballet and the only way to ballet was to use the potty.) So far so good!

She has been doing great and it is all 'her idea'.

I guess what they say is true...bribing kids works when they are ready, they are ready!

Anyway, back to ballet.

I sat in the corner of the studio with Charlotte as the girls warmed up. I think my presence was making it hard for the instructor so when Grace wasn't looking I hid where I could still see Grace but she couldn't see me.

Success! No tears!

(Looks like I am on the market for a red tutu!)

This cracked me up. The instructor wanted the girls to walk across the floor on their tiptoes and then twirl in the hula hoop. There could be no better task to assign Grace because she walks on her tip toes ALL THE TIME! I mean ALL THE TIME...so here was her chance to put all her "practice" to good use!

She eventually caught on but still it made me laugh. Getting through ballet with no tears was a big step for Grace...and me! I could literally feel her confidence level boost! When we talked about it the car she told me she had fun and liked the music...and that she didn't cry!

Baby steps people! Baby, tip-toeing, ballerina baby steps!

Grace's First Day of School

Today wasn't even the "real" first day of school - just orientation -and I am not going to lie. It was rough.

I was up before dawn. I was excited and nervous about how this day would go. After getting myself put together (i.e. actually brushing my hair!) and getting organized for breakfast and beyond, it was time to get the girls up. We had a big day ahead of us!

First, pictures by the trees! A mandatory first day of school tradition.

Grace was very excited. 

"Do you want to go to school?" I asked.

"Yeah. They'll be kids. Lots of kids. And boys." she answered.

"Grace, who's your teacher?" I asked.

"Mrs. Campbell. She's a nice lady."she replied.

Obviously, we've been talking a lot about school lately.

She looks ready to me!

Charlotte was gearing up for a big day too! Not first-day-of-school-big but worthy of a picture by her tree nonetheless!

Charlotte was going to music class with Nana!

Not even 8 am yet and she is already dirty!

I don't know how she does it!

I dropped Charlotte and Nana off at Charlotte's music class. Met the teacher and a couple of parents. Charlotte was jazzed! Running all over the classroom and shrieking with joy. Grace was in good sprits too as we said goodbye to Charlotte and Nana and headed to school!

One kid down....one to go!

(Charlotte had a lot of fun at music class! High spirits and high energy according to Nana!)

We got to Grace's school and were greeted by lots of smiling teachers and helpers. Grace got to pick out her very own school bag. She chose purple! She was given a name tag which had her name on it - obviously - and a ladybug - her symbol for the school year.

Grace loves lady bugs and I took it a good omen!

We placed Grace's new school bag in her cubby and set off to wash hands. We looked around the classroom at toys, puzzles, play dough and more! The parents were instructed to get their child set up with an activity and then meet in an ajacent classroom so we could go over school rules and procedures while the children met their teacher and their classmates.

Grace quickly found some puzzles and her friend, R, so I thought we were good to go. I told her I was would be in the next room and that I would be back in a little bit. (Mind you, the next room is visible from where the children were playing. It was almost as if we were all in the same room...almost.)

The parents slowly gathered in "our" room while the children did remarkably well separating from their parents. I was so happy. Grace seemed to be enjoying the new toys and the new faces.

So far, so good! I was able to snap one picture...

and then all hell broke loose.

First, I caught her glancing in my direction. Just checking in to see where I was. Then, I could see her strain around a corner or a book shelf to make sure I was still there. Next thing I knew, she was standing at the entrance to the parents' classroom. A quick wave from me and the teacher was able to re-direct Grace into a new activity.

At the next drive-by, the teacher mouthed that I needed to come talk to Grace. I could tell that her pride was holding back tears and my heart deflated and sank into the pit of my stomach...where it still resides.

Grace and I hugged. We talked a bit. I got her involved with some building blocks. She seemed distracted and content so I re-joined the parents.

Moments later, a teacher returned with a sobbing Grace in her arms. If your heart can sink lower than the pit of your stomach, mine surely did.

I spent the remainder of the class with Grace. I showed her the fish tank and the crayons. The kitchen and the supply of Kleenex. We talked to all the teachers and found some books. She hiccuped and gasped.

Several times, I tried to leave her in the care of a teacher to re-join the parent group.

It never worked.

Class went on for what felt like an eternity. I couldn't wait for it to be over. I could only imagine what Grace felt like. Especially when she kept saying she wanted to get in the car and go home.

As we exited, Mrs. Campbell told me that Grace should bring a comfort item next time. Next time?! How could I possibly think about next time? I had just spent the better part of an hour with the child that every mother hopes she doesn't have on the first day of school.

I was fighting back my own tears just trying to get out of there. I felt defeated and like a failure. 

I obviously hadn't prepared her as well as I could have...as I should have.

In the car, just the two of us, Grace settled down. I asked her if she had liked school expecting a resounding noooo. Amazingly she said yes! I asked her if she wanted to go back and again she said yes! When I asked her why she got so upset all she could muster was, "I needed Mommy. Gracie was sad."

Tears. Flowing. Then. And now as I write.

This parenting thing is hard. So hard. 

And the first day of school? I ain't gonna lie. It kicked my a**.

Inspirational Service

This past weekend we went to a memorial service for a relative of a relative of mine who was a remarkable woman.  It is crazy the things we only find out about people after they pass. For one, she kept an opposite-of-a-bucket-list list. Meaning, instead of writing down all the meaningful things she hoped to do some day, she wrote down all the things that she did EACH day that were meaningful. She glorified the significance in each day instead of hoping that tomorrow would bring whatever today failed to reveal. 

Her children, friends and husband all spoke - a feat beyond measure in my book. When the tables are turned, I doubt I'll be able to find the next breath let alone words. 

   While the circumstances of our gathering were unfortunate, the location was heaven-sent for kids - and big kids - alike!

Western Washington. Gig harbor area - on the water. It was pretty awesome. The sun was shining. You could see Mt. Rainier. It really doesn't get much better.

(For the record, I wouldn't be opposed to finding a summer cabin in my stocking at Christmas! Just sayin'!)

A rocky beach! Charlotte was in heaven. 

She hasn't met a rock that she doesn't want to carry, hold, love or eat!

Grace kept busy by throwing rocks into the water.

It was a sad and emotional day.  The service was right in the middle of nap time so neither girl slept. Towards the end, they were ready to go.  

Especially Charlotte.